This week, I started reading a book called Big Magic, written by Elizabeth Gilbert, the author of Eat, Pray, Love.
After finishing the first 5 chapters, I closed the book with a new sense of inspiration. Isn’t that the best feeling? When you start a new book and really feel the connection to the author’s words. Sometimes you want to continue reading just to devour every last word. But this book made me want to savor every lesson, and so I forced myself to close the book and chose instead to reflect on what I read.
There was a lot jammed into those first few chapters, but what struck me initially was the concept of “creating a life without fear.” One of the first things that became most obvious to me throughout my mid-divorce period of self-reflection, was how much fear I lived with in every facet of my life — fear of not knowing, fear of being exposed for not knowing, fear of failure, fear of approval/disapproval from my loved ones and oddly enough…fear of success.
There is so little we control in life, why did I let fear take over? It’s paralyzing.
I have started a few blogs over the years. And I never followed through on any of them. In fairness, I was a busy mommy so maybe creating content on a regular basis was not a practical plan. But if I am totally honest with myself, I think a big reason I was unable to follow-through with my plans, was because I was innately afraid of putting myself out there.
It is life-changing to embrace who you are and share how you feel for the world to kick-around. I was afraid of it, but I am becoming more and more comfortable every day. Facing this fear is part of my healing. And if the parts of me that I share here can help someone else in my situation live with less fear – then you know what? It’s worth the risk…